Rainbows Love in The Time

In his timeless novel Love in the Time of Cholera Gabriel García Márquez crushes the notion that falling in love is only for the young.

Valentine’s Day next Monday, the young men of Bali’s GAYa Dewata foundation will speak more widely of love in the time of “rainbows” that exists among humans worldwide during a public forum at the Bali Museum in Denpasar.

This year’s day of love marks the 19th anniversary of the organization, first established in 1992 to raise awareness among the homosexual community of AIDS and HIV, a disease the group still works to prevent within the gay community. Through their public outreach day on Feb. 14 the group is also sending a message of solidarity with their brothers and sisters living in parts of Indonesia where discrimination against same sex love is rife.

“We will hold this anniversary celebration on Valentine’s Day because a lot of [gay people] in other cities are still being discriminated against. Here in Bali we are accepted by the community. Out of this Bali discussion forum we want to highlight that some people still have negative feelings towards gay people, so we want to show them that we can be united in a positive direction,” explains head of Bali GAYa Dewata, Christian Supriyadinata.

He is open and eloquent when discussing the fact of being born gay, lesbian or most difficulty, warisah or transsexual.

We are trying to inform people that we are not different, just our sexual orientation is different,” says Christian who raises ideas of the sameness of humans written about by Shakespeare in Shylock’s cry “if you prick us do we not bleed?”

“Everyone from birth hopes to be the same as those around them — we did not want to be born gay or transsexual. Also our parents did not hope for children born gay, but if we are born gay it is God’s blessing. People only live the life God gave us. This is the living color of life,” says Christian of the diversity of possibilities within the DNA strands and the hormones these produce across all life forms.
He points to the gradations of possibility that occur in a day.

“We have day and night, but we also have the light of mornings and evenings. We have black and white, but we also have all the colors of the rainbow, in humans we have children born male or female and the variables within that so we have gays and lesbians, transsexuals and heterosexuals, so between those two male and female absolutes there is a lot of variation — there is a rainbow [of consenting adult sexuality] and we need to respect this. We are people and we only wish to live and value what God gave us,” says Christian who knew since he was 12 years of age that he was different to other boys.

“I didn’t like girls — I liked boys. Romantically I felt love and attention for boys; I felt all those things kids in love feel, embarrassed and shy, the feelings young boys and girls feel, so it’s the same for boys who fall in love with boys,” says Christian.

He adds while he has never spoken openly with his parents about his sexual orientation, it was understood from very early on.

“My parents never asked, but they knew I was like this — gay. They also knew I would never marry and they never pushed me. If I had forced myself to marry, life would have been torture for me and my wife, I would have had to live someone else’s life,” says Christian.

As a straight looking guy, Christian has never faced discrimination. For attractive young women like Corazon and Sofia, born with male genitalia, but women in all other aspects of existence, they have faced some discrimination for their genetic choices in love.

“My parents accept me as a transsexual,” says 31-year-old Corazon.

“Out of six kids, my parents have three that are different. One brother is also transsexual and a sister is a lesbian. I have faced discrimination, even here in Bali, but that is if I go out in hot pants or short skirts. Then I get wolf whistles and other negative comments. If I wear a long dress there is no problem,” says Corazon highlighting the fact that in Bali it is not sexual orientation in love matches that the public reacts to, but rather culturally inappropriate attire.
Her hopes for Valentine’s Day are generous, “this is a day to give love to all. Love everyone, don’t look at gender, female, male, transsexual, gay or lesbian — it’s not about your sexual orientation status but about love,” says Corazon.

Twenty-six-year-old Sofia, is an elegant, friendly person who has been dressing as a woman since she was 16. Her family accepts her as a woman as does the rest of society. When asked why she had not opted for a gender re-alignment to bring her genitalia into line with her real self, she was wise beyond her years.

“I see that if I had the operation and then got married, I may end up divorced because I could not have children. Or I could be beaten by my husband, so I am safer to be a male in female clothing,” says Sofia who with the rest of the gang at the GAYa Dewata foundation knew from childhood their Valentine Days would be different.

“At school, playing sports like soccer, we would join in, but we ran like girls,” laugh Sofia, Corazon and Christian.